The Work

“Just imagine becoming the way you used to be as a very young child, before opinions took over your mind. The real you is loving, joyful and free. The real you is just like a flower, just like the wind, just like the ocean, just like the sun.”

– Miguel Angel Ruiz

Me as an Abstract Expressionist (photo by the author)

In the studio I want to be a child
running to the beach ahead of my parents,
blonde hair flying,
brown curls bouncing in the sun.

It isn’t easy looking and thinking.
Just paint, let the paint fall,
let it drip and bleed.
Is it good
when I relinquish control?

I want to change it,
brush it out and around
till that stilted canvas
is a wall to climb.

I go to sleep defeated,
dreaming of taking pictures
of everyone I’ve loved
so I will remember.

Today, when I let it go
I saw a door.